leavin

In reply to June-an : http://junean.blogspot.com , trust no one, almost here... 25feb06

Yet I have always been here
Hidden
All in prose,
Behind your rhymes
Left behind in your shadows
Made by your very light

Yet I thought
I were your light
Ever so light
Never as bright
As you would have wished

And now that you are bleeding
All my colors have faded
And mine is a world
In black and white.

So tonight will never be right
Ever, will never be the beginning
Of an ever ending story

Then when you say you need me,
you heed me,
And the closer I get,
The further I am...
And then it’s almost like
I 've never been
Ever so close
always almost there ...

But you never see me
For a light never sees a shadow
And even before I was gone
I was a but a shadow to your light.
It wasn't right
So the road for me tonight
Is mine for the taking,
and the wish of you,
mine for the making.

Change the world you have
For mine is ever changed.
Levied from the insight,
Heavied from the inside.
and nothing ever is the same
for the sting is under my skin.

But now I must go,
Away, with yet another flow
For the road tonight
Is mine to take
The road tonight, is mine to take...

Do you know me
When the choices I make
And the roads I take
Are the ones less traveled,
Harrowing and ever winding, blinding
Never binding,
Impossible to see
With no reasons ever made possible

Do you know me
when the seas I sail
Quail me beyond my fears
and the rough waters drown me
a little more everyday
in every way.

I know you loved me,
More than I could ever have given back
So I got taken aback
Like a whip made slack
For the closer I got
Never was close enough
So the further away I moved.

I ran as fast as I should
But understand you never would
That catch up I never could.
The closer I got, the further I were.

So that road I stepped unto
It takes me else where I can't undo
The doings of my wrongs
The effects to my cause
And come back I never can
For the bridges we built
We have cut on either end.

So tonight, my heart is tight
For the road is mine to take.
And tomorrow I shall wake
Ever to find you were right.
And from today,
every other morning I shall live see,
will be one of regrets.

But now that I am gone,
the light that shone
ever so bright
In your eyes shall rekindle
And set ablaze
The fury of your mind
For I was
But a shadow in your light.
But a feather to your sight.

Carpe Diem

about madness

...to any coin there is a flipping side,

Hidden and left to be discovered.

And before you go tossing your life around

Here, hear my words…

The flipped side of the coin

It is also madness …

to keep fighting a tide

when all about you has left the waters

and run to the high grounds

to see the very tide you are fighting

Suck you out from where you should be going

madness, to believe in friends who have backstabbed you

So many a times that you are left counting the holes in your heart

and yet welcome them

when they come smiling back to you

with a gun in their hands

cocked and ready to drop lead through same holes

made by the steel of their blunt blades

madness to keep pushing through thorn bushes

to find your rose, all white and pure

awaiting your rise

and the moment you reach for the promised

to see it taken away by the same foes

than once were to be your friends

with the same blunt blades that cut

through the hopes that you were breeding.

Madness to see it all without ever having the wits or guts to react

Madness to keep your smile and sanity and put up against the world

When inside you have burnt yourself with sorrow

And died a thousand times over

And never risen to any skies promised.

Madness to keep your prayers and faith open to the word

when all about you is killing and soiling

for the name same Father and Creator we are both living for.

MADNESS to keep your efforts strained, unstained

For the same purpose

And see it all taken down

By the hands of the same

For whom you would have fought and dwelved and given up your life…

Madness to keep your love for that one and same rose

Whose thorns have cut through and torn you to tatters many a times

Wrecked and wrenched every single breath you have taken

Ever since the first day you laid eyes upon her,

And known that thorns were yours for the keeping

And the rose theirs for the reaping…

It is madness to keep fighting, smiling

When all about you are running for shelter

Madness to face the raging torrents

When all about you are digging for cover, as ever.

Madness to keep living and pushing

When death is the only certitude

That we carry

Every step of the way…

But then

Madness is our savior

It keeps us afloat in the raging waters

Breathing, when our last breath has been broken and soiled

Yielding when all around us has stopped believing

Standing when all about us has dropped to their knees in despair

Striving when the brave hath given up their quest and turned their backs to the battle…

If madness is about striving, serving and not yielding

Searching, pushing on and never faltering

Then madmen we are !

And Blessed be the madness that has made of us

Simple mortals hidden under the cloak of unsung heroes

Simple beggars with the heart of untamed lions.

Fighters with nothing but our bare hands and hearts.

Madness is as ever the beginning of sanity as smoke is to fire

Carpe Diem